


V Flower Gets Trapped In A Macys

by Kalciium



Category: Vocaloid
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, Shoplifting, flower and xin hua and the meikas are all siblings, flower drinks perfume now, fukase listens to insane clown posse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:41:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26986897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kalciium/pseuds/Kalciium
Summary: The Gynoid Vocaloids (and Fukase) go to the mall one Saturday morning and end up forgetting someone on the way out. Flower has to escape Macy's now. Also on Quotev.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10





	V Flower Gets Trapped In A Macys

Saturday mornings were quite average in the Gynoid household. Hime and Mikoto were just being normal, as they sat in their bedroom watching videos such as 15 Incredible Rat Tricks (Number 7 Will Shock You, I Know It Shocked Me), narrated by a guy who sounds like he looks like a fucking nerd and has a voice that would be considered the opposite of ASMR. Xin Hua was asleep, having yet another dream where she lived in the Minecraft universe, alongside Minecraft Steve. In the dream, she and Steve were quite close friends, but it seemed Steve was about to betray her in an extremely fucked up and evil way. Flower was in her room, playing Garfield Kart on her Nintendo 3DS which she doesn't remember if she stole or not. But it's purple, so who cares.

After getting last place in Garfield Kart for what seemed like the hundredth time, Flower turned off her 3DS and put it on her bedside table, hoping her glass of chocolate milk wouldn't make her game device die while she wasn't looking. As soon as she turned around, got up, and went into her closet, however, the milk spilled all over the 3DS, causing it to no longer function. "Fuck." she muttered under her breath, hearing the device spark until it didn't work anymore. Now she had to play Garfield Kart on Steam instead.

She got dressed into an outfit that would make people walking past her in public mistake her for a Tiktok e-boy and went out of her room after wiping up the mess that caused her 3DS to be fucking murdered by her chocolate milk. Xin Hua was finally awake, on the couch half-asleep mindlessly scrolling through TV channels, which all seemed to play various different Vin Diesel movies. Flower sat next to Xin Hua on the couch.

"Do you wanna hear about the dream I had?" Xin Hua asked, exiting the TV guide.

"Was it Minecraft related again?" Flower questioned, and Xin Hua nodded in response.

"It was really messed up, I think. I was roommates with Minecraft Steve, and we were close friends, right?" She continued. "And we were starting to get closer, right? But as soon as I thought we were inseparable little Minecraft square buddies, he stabbed me in the face with a diamond sword and robbed me." Xin Hua began to shed a tear. "I just don't think Steve would be like that in real life, Flower. He seemed so nice in the games..."

"Sorry to hear that.." Flower replied. "It's okay, though, it's not like it was real. Minecraft Steve is fictional, you can imagine him however you'd like. I don't think he has a set personality either."

"So if Steve was my friend in real life he WOULDN'T try to kill me?" Xin Hua said in-between tears. Flower nodded, putting her hand on Xin Hua's back. "He seems like a pretty nice guy, I think if someone tried to kill you then he'd be the one to stop them." Flower said.

"Thanks, Flower.." Xin Hua mumbled, wiping her tears away. "Did you dream anything weird last night?"

"Yeah, actually," Flower began, "I had a dream I got trapped inside a Macy's for months. Kinda fucked up. I got to escape eventually, though, so that's cool."

"Didn't you dream that last week, too?" Xin Hua asked, taking a sip of a glass of milk that seemed to conveniently appear out of nowhere so my writing could seem better and like she's not just sitting there.

"Did I? I can't remember." Flower collapsed onto the couch, staring at the cartoon multicolored horses on the TV. They all seemed to stare into the camera for this episode, for some reason. Maybe it was the lost episode, like in those weird Creepypastas where cartoon characters become mass murderers and come out of the screen for no reason other than to allegedly 'ruin childhoods'. Flower thought those kinds of stories sucked ass, though. So maybe not.

An hour had passed, it was 11AM now. Flower had planned to go to the mall this weekend, and she thought Saturday morning seemed like a good time to go. She called Fukase to drive her over, since neither her nor Xin Hua had licenses, (Flower tried getting one once or twice, but she nearly killed dozens of grandmas just trying to drive to McDonald's. Xin Hua was simply too scared to drive after hearing of Flower's shitty driving. The Meikas were, obviously, too young to drive.) though she hadn't decided whether the others were coming with her or not.

Hime and Mikoto were now on the couch, arguing over which Nagito Komaeda yandere ASMR roleplay video on YouTube they watched earlier was better, and Xin Hua was looking at pictures of nice dresses she wish she could afford without having to sell three kidneys on her phone. Flower was about to turn the doorknob, when Xin Hua looked up and asked where she was going.

"I'm having Fukase drive me to the mall," Flower explained. "do you guys wanna come with?" Hime seemed excited suddenly, jumping off the couch, dragging Mikoto with them as they begged Flower to let them come with.

"Oh, sure," Xin Hua said, putting her phone in her dress pocket. They all walked out of their house and into the front yard, where Fukase's stupid fucking clown car was parked right outside their house. Hime excitedly waved at Fukase through the window, before smashing one of the backseat windows and crawling in. Mikoto followed them. Flower and Xin Hua squeezed themselves into the car as well, Flower being next to Fukase and Xin Hua being to the right of Hime and Mikoto respectively.

"Hey guys," Fukase said awkwardly, before turning on the radio to blast one of his favorite bands, Insane Clown Posse. Except the song was nightcored, for some reason. "Okay, so where the fuck were we going again? I assumed we were going to the circus again, I think it was pretty fucked up when that clown died in his little car though."

"The mall?" Xin Hua responded. 

"Oh, yeah, there," Fukase said, backing out of the driveway. "Maybe I'll get my fingernails pierced at Claire's again."

For the entire car ride, the nightcore Insane Clown Posse was blasting throughout the car so loud, the clown car was shaking and honking along to the bass. Hime and Mikoto ended up learning all the words, though, and screamed most of them out the shattered window. The people driving past were concerned. Flower was scared.

After 20 minutes, they were now in the parking lot of the shopping mall. Fukase drove into a spot, and the car stopped, the nightcore clown music finally stopping along with it. Xin Hua awkwardly squeezed out of the clown car, the clown music still reverberating in her head. Hime and Mikoto practically sprinted out of the car, and Flower just walked out.

"Wait, are you coming with us, too, or..?" Xin Hua asked, and Fukase nodded, walking out of the car. "Yeah, that's why I said I'd get my fingernails pierced again. Let's go."

They all walked inside the shopping mall, it wasn't that crowded somehow despite being a weekend. A group of people with black and white clown makeup stood outside a candy store, trading gummies with each-other, probably the alcoholic gummy bears or the ones that look like dicks despite being palm trees. There was a small child in a Freddy Fazbear onesie sitting with his mom nearby, and three grown men in My Little Pony shirts who appeared to be in a violent fist-fight. A normal day at the shopping mall.

"Hey, look," Fukase began, pointing at the inside of a store. "they got the ugliest shirts known to man in here, can we go in??" Flower looked through the windows, seeing a piss-colored shirt with dark rainbow glittery letters that said 'I'M A SLYTHERIN and my GRANDMA IS 74 YEARS OLD and I'M AN ARIES'. She physically cringed at it, but she wanted to buy it desperately. "Fuck yeah. Let's go in."

They all went in the store, and good god they were surrounded by soccer mom looking women. They all seemed to be wearing clothes that were very obviously from this place, one of which wearing a red Minion shirt that said 'MY KIDS ARE NAMED DESTIEL AND JOHNLOCK'. Flower wanted to rob her. She and Fukase examined the mannequins on display, all were wearing that exact shirt but in different colors. Fukase grabbed one despite it being three sizes too big, holding it over his chest.

"Hey, Flower, should I get this shirt, or the piss colored Slytherin shirt?" Fukase asked. Flower looked closer at it, noticing a coffee stain under the text.

"Buy it, wear it once after thoroughly washing it, and then set it on fire." Flower stated. Fukase stuffed it under his arm, skipping over to another shelf with shirts, or whatever they're called. He found more disgusting fucking shirts, one having a really low-res image of Finn Wolfhard outside his garage giving the middle finger. Hime and Mikoto ran over towards Fukase, noticing the shirt.

"Mikoto, let's get matching shirts like that!!" Hime said excitedly, grabbing the shirt right off the shelf. Mikoto examined the shirt, their nose starting to itch because they started violently sniffing the shirt.

"What material is this?" Mikoto asked, caressing the shirt. Now they really had to buy it.

"Uhh, I dunno, fabric?" Hime said, grabbing another Finn Wolfhard giving the finger shirt and handing it to Mikoto. Mikoto inhaled the shirt so hard their nose started to burn.

"I'm allergic." Mikoto stated, stuffing it under their arm. Xin Hua was across the store with Flower, trying to see if they had any good clothing here. Flower found a shirt that especially spoke to her, though, a long-sleeved shirt with Phineas from Phineas and Ferb on it but in an especially emo style. Under the illustration, it said "GREEN DAY" in big red letters. Flower grabbed it, holding it close. She smelled it slightly, it smelled freshly washed, and it didn't burn her nose.

"I need this shirt." Flower muttered, stuffing it in Xin Hua's purse.

"Wait, why my purse?" Xin Hua asked.

"I don't have one, and I," Flower leaned in to whisper into Xin Hua's ear, "am going to shoplift this."

"What the hell, you can't just fucking shoplift here!" Xin Hua yelled, though still trying to seem quiet. Somehow nobody heard her. 

"Uh, yes I can, actually," Flower argued, "I just saw a grown woman with 3 kids stuff a Mario shirt into her purse a minute ago."

Xin Hua tried to argue back, but she couldn't think of anything, so she just went up to Fukase and the Meikas and asked if they wanted to shoplift it all. They seemed to agree, somehow, so they walked out of the store without paying for anything, and yet still having a shirt for everyone. Xin Hua had gotten a shit-colored shirt with Kermit the Frog on it, holding a gun.

"Way to go, you're a criminal accomplice now," Flower teased Xin Hua as they walked out of the store.

"Only because you insisted you wanted to steal that Phineas shirt.." she replied. "I won't be surprised if the fucking CEO shows up to our house tomorrow asking us to pay a hundred dollar fine."

"Shoplift that, too," Fukase joked. "Just close the door and wait for them to leave."

"We'll be arrested," Xin Hua responded. "Anyway, next store we go to can we PLEASE pay for the shit we buy?"

"Yeah, otherwise we might actually get caught." Flower said. "I bet some fucking kid in a Minion costume's overhearing us right now and making his mom call the cops on us."

They all walked inside a Hot Topic together, and coincidentally they were blasting nightcore Insane Clown Posse. Fukase gasped, and ran to the cashier, slamming his fist on the counter.

"H-how did you know I love Insane Clown Posse?" Fukase asked, the cashier looking concerned.

"I don't choose the music that plays, I just work here.." the cashier said. "Are you here to file a complaint?"

"No, I just got here, actually," Fukase said, leaning against the counter. "so, do you like Insane Clown Posse? My favorite song by them is My Axe, I think."

"I don't know what an Insane Clown Posse is.." the cashier replied, feeling secondhand embarrassment for Fukase. "Please just go on and buy some shit with your friends, I think one of them just ripped a hole in a Riverdale shirt."

"Shit," Fukase muttered, turning around and seeing Hime rip holes into a Riverdale shirt with their fingernails. He ran over to them and Mikoto, picking up Hime in his arms to prevent them from doing any damage. "You're gonna have to buy that shirt now so they don't get mad, y'know..!"

"Why would they get mad? They're selling ripped jeans already," Hime asked, confusedly.

"..You have a point, but it's considered property damage, I think, so.." Fukase put them down, grabbing the Riverdale shirt from the.. thingy with the hangers on it and the shirts and hoodies. He handed it to Hime. "You're gonna buy this now, and you might wear it, who knows, but it has to be yours now or they'll call the cops on us."

"Okay," Hime said, grabbing the shirt from his hands along with a matching Riverdale shirt from the hanger thingy. "Mikoto, you get the ripped one!"  
"Why do I get the ripped one?!" Mikoto said, disappointed. "The holes are so massive they don't even look that cool."

"Are you criticizing my hard work?!" Hime yelled. Fukase awkwardly walked away, and towards where Flower and Xin Hua were.

Flower was picking out band shirts, and Xin Hua was nearby looking at the "Hey Assbutt" pins admiringly. She grabbed a couple, and stuffed them in her purse, quietly snickering to herself like that episode of Family Guy where Lois Griffin shoplifted and burned herself with a cigarette. Fukase walked over to Xin Hua.

"What are you doing? You have to pay for those," Fukase whispered. "Do you WANT us to get kicked out?"

"Nobody'll notice if you shut up," Xin Hua whispered back. Flower walked over towards them, holding a fucking humongous My Chemical Romance shirt with a oujia board esque design on it.

"Hey, this is the only size I can find, and I want this one, soo.." Flower began. "It's like, three sizes too big."

"Just buy it, it'll look cute either way," Xin Hua said, smiling. Flower looked at the shirt, realizing how tiny she was compared to it.

"Big shirt comfy..." Flower said softly under her breath, tucking the shirt under her arm. "I'll buy this, I think."

After Flower and Xin Hua picked out some jewelry for each-other, Hime and Mikoto got matching Riverdale shirts, and Fukase got some more jewelry and candy (plus a few stolen pins, heehee), they paid for their stuff and walked out.

"I heard Macy's has a good deal on socks right now," Xin Hua said, holding her and Flower's bag of stuff. "should we go there? They got a buy 1 get 5 deal on socks, for $4."

"I was needing socks, actually," Mikoto brought up. "Hime keeps ripping holes in mine, I have to tell them to stop."

"I ripped holes in all my socks already, though!" Hime whined, grabbing a box of Pocky out from Fukase's bag and opening it within two seconds.

"Stop ripping holes in things, Hime," Flower said. "and PLEASE stop taking bites out of my band posters, too, I paid good money on eBay for those you know!"

"Sowwy..." Hime apologized, looking genuinely guilty for their crimes of eating Flower's posters and ripping holes in everything.

Finally, the gang got to the outside of Macy's. Flower remembered her dream of getting trapped in there for months, and mentally prepared herself. She hoped it wouldn't be real. She PRAYED it wouldn't be real.

They all walked into the department store, and all Flower could smell was expensive perfumes. She saw so many fancy handbags and clothes that only people who worship Taylor Swift would wear, and what seemed to be bootleg Gucci clothing? Explain?

"I'm gonna go find the socks, and you guys can go do whatever you want." Xin Hua said, running off before anyone could object to splitting up and looking for clues. Flower sighed, grabbing another box of Pocky from Fukase's bag.

"Why's everyone taking my Pocky, I wanted to try those all myself..." Fukase muttered, walking away so he could go find the perfumes and try to snort them up his nose. You know, like normal people do. Fukase is a good, normal boy.

Hime and Mikoto were already out of Flower's sight, and Flower decided she should look for something too. She tried to remember what they had at Macy's, before remembering she saw a really cool leather jacket at the store once years ago. She wanted to see if they still had something similar, so she began her search.

After thirty minutes, she couldn't find a single leather jacket that was remotely close to what she saw years ago, as the ones she found were all either shit colored or designed by JoJo Siwa. She sighed, sitting down next to a shelf of Gucci handbags, which were apparently not real Gucci. A shame, as Flower always wanted to rob a celebrity and use their money to buy Gucci, ever since she heard Gucci Gang by Lil Pump. When she realized she was ready to go, she also realized the others were not nearby. Feeling slightly anxious, she pulled out her phone and texted Xin Hua.

"hey, im ready to go, where are u and the others???" the text read. She accidentally sent it twice, but no big deal. Immediate response.

"We're already driving home, actually.. Are you still @ Macy's???" Xin Hua's reply said. Flower's heart sank to her ass, because that's a normal good feeling to have when you read a text!

"....yes. I am still at macys." Flower's text reply read. After a minute, she got a phone call from Xin Hua, and she answered it, her hands shaking.

"I should've listened, oh fuck, I'm sorry," Xin Hua said over the phone, her voice shaking. "We shouldn't have split up and looked for clues, I've been watching too much fucking Scooby Doo, I'm so sorry, oh god..."

"No, it's fine, I'll be fine here." Flower said. "I'll just have to stay here for the rest of the day, right? Or you can just drive back and get me?"

"We can't drive you back, none of us know how to drive except Fukase." Xin Hua explained. "But he has a concert tonight, and after the concert is a new Rick and Morty episode he can't afford to miss. I'm so fucking sorry, oh god," Xin Hua was nearly choking on her tears. "just stay safe, okay??"

"I can just walk back, right?" Flower asked. "I can just walk back home, right??"

"Flower, you can barely run a mile," Xin Hua said, "what on god's green earth makes you think you'll be able to walk back home from the MALL, when it takes 20 minutes to get there by car?!!"

Flower's heart sunk deeper into her body, now feeling like it was in her feet rather than her ass. Another normal feeling.

"I'm fucked, aren't I?" Flower muttered into the phone. "You guys can get me tomorrow, right? Or Fukase can postpone his concert and use his DVR to record Rick and Morty??"

"The concert's been postponed several times before, they won't allow any more," Xin Hua explained. "and his DVR doesn't work. You're gonna be stuck there for the rest of the day."

Flower started anxiously tapping her fingers against the cold Macy's flooring. "..You'll remember to pick me up tomorrow, right?"

"We'll try our best." Xin Hua said into the phone, before hanging up. Flower sighed, turning her phone off and staring off into space. She was in a Macy's, with nowhere to go. She was lost at a fucking Macy's. As if she were a 5 year old in a Minion costume.

She didn't know what time it was, so she looked at her phone. Her battery was already low, and she hadn't brought her little portable charger thing. It was already 6PM somehow. She sighed, as she watched employees walk by.

She was gonna have to deal with this for a while. And if Xin Hua forgot to have her picked up tomorrow, she was fucked. Suddenly she heard the doors of the Macy's close, and a voice over the intercom say it was closing time, and that the employees had to clean up. Flower rested her head on her knees, watching them walk by but faster. None of them noticed her.

A bottle of perfume fell next to her, shattering. She dragged her finger along the puddle of perfume juices, careful not to touch glass, and licked it gently. It tasted bitter as shit, not anything like the smell. Those perfume ads with Johnny Depp fucking lied, they made it seem like it tasted so good.

It was gonna be a long day at Macy's, being trapped in there with the employees, who also got trapped inside Macy's whenever it was closing time. Flower licked more perfume juice off the floor, as she was thirsty and that was the only thing nearby. She had finished her Pocky box already, so consumption of non-liquids was out of the way. After a while, the perfume started tasting quite good. She licked it all off the floor, somehow not cutting her tongue on the glass shards.

"What kinda perfume was that..?" she asked herself. She examined the shards, then matched them to a bottle of perfume still on the shelf. She recognized it from the fucking Johnny Depp perfume commercials. "Weow..."

It had only been a few minutes after realizing she was trapped at Macy's, and she had already started loving the taste of perfume.

It was going to be a long, long fucking day at Macy's.

**Author's Note:**

> wow!! i wish i could read!!<3


End file.
